• Crystal Rios

Hmmm, I wonder how I can experience them/this as my ally?

Do you fight with your loved ones? Do you bicker? Create tiffs? Squabble? Nag? Feel annoyed? Have texting arguments? What do you do when you disagree with someone?


This wonder question and wondering in general, is such a magic move! When you see your partner, your spouse, and/or the world as your ally, almost all conflict has no power.


When you are willing to take 100% responsibility for your perception, words and actions, the world becomes more friendly.


When you are willing to listen, you can broaden your awareness and be present with others. This is where the healing takes place.... in the presence-ing.


Looking back at some of the most helpful practices our relationship coach gave us, SEEING EACH OTHER AS ALLIES has been one of the ways that we stop fighting.


When we forget we are on the same team, we tend to argue about the littlest things. Arguing for who is right... Arguing for the adrenalin push.... Arguing to create space unconsciously.


In this unprecedented time, our country is the most divided I have ever seen. After watching the documentary the Social Dilemma, I realized that social media and algorithms show us what we want to see, more of the same.


This is one reason I think I cannot even believe how people can think differently than me. I am shocked when people think climate change isn't real. I am disgusted by racism. I feel terrible when I hear about people dying from Covid-19. How could anyone think it is a hoax?


After the election, I am still shocked that so many people voted for some one who said, "You know, I’m automatically attracted to beautiful — I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything.... Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything." -New York TIMES transcript


With everything that needs reforming, I can forget that we are on this planet together. That we are more alike than we are different. I forget that we are on the same team.


So, I recommit to seeing them/ this as my ally.


I choose to be large and contain multitudes like Walt Whitman's poem...


I see possibility. I see how we can overcome this divisiveness and fighting. It is through LISTENING.


My goal is to start listening and researching how people who seem to have such different beliefs than I, got to this place.


I can see how I got to where I am. It was the person who asked me if I had ever heard of the 7 chakras. It was that new age hippie drum shop in Denton, Voyager's dream. It was my insatiable hunger and longing for God.


Do you want to create unity, love and understanding? Are you willing to see me as your ally?







in collaboration with Hendricks.com

WONDER question from Tallpoppy.com

photo credit Adrian Swancar




i am committed to creating a diverse and inclusive community
that honors the experiences of People of Color, members of the
LGBTQ* community, and other marginalized identities.

Call or text anytime

562-637-3763

Or email

consciouslovinglab@gmail.com

  • White Instagram Icon
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • LinkedIn

© 2018 by Crystal Dawn Rios